Bonus Tidying Up Tuesday: Ryan's Clothes

Since I've started my tidying mission, Ryan's been asking me when we're going to do his clothes. I told him we could do it whenever he wanted, and he hasn't taken me up on it. But on Tuesday, he ended up taking an unexpected day off work, and I needed a project, so we did his clothes!

The closet in our room, which has Ryan's stuff in it

When we moved in, we put two tension rods in the closet for Ryan to hang his clothes on. It was a quick fix so we could get unpacked, and we've never taken the time to actually fix up our closet.

Ryan's dresser. He has six fairly small drawers.

For privacy's sake I didn't take "before" pictures of Ryan's drawers. But suffice it to say that they were stuffed full. Ryan often drags his feet on putting away laundry that I've washed and folded for him because getting the laundry into the drawers is such a pain.

The pile. Our biggest by far.

Shoes to sort (I didn't want them on my bed)

It took almost four hours to go through Ryan's clothes, sort the keepers, and get everything back in place. Usually when Ryan or I has a project we do it on our own, and the other person keeps the kids out of the way. Getting to work on a project together was so nice. I got to explain all of Marie Kondo's tidying principles. Ryan got to share a lot of the memories behind his clothes as we sorted through them. Going through his clothing was a chance for us to have a long conversation, and I'm really glad we got to spend that time together. Also, the transformation was really dramatic!

Everything in this photo is garbage or headed to Goodwill or the consignment shop. Except the chair.

Ryan's "hang up clothes" now fit entirely on one tension rod. When he's done renovating our bathroom, our closet is going to get a makeover. We might even have room in there for my clothes, too!

New and improved sock drawer

Gym clothes

T-shirts

We are now completely done with organizing the clothes in our home. Next week is our books and magazines.

Tidying Up Tuesday: The Boys' Clothes

I've designated Tuesdays as tidying days, but with the boys in school, that would mean doing their tidying in the evenings. That's a busy time of day at our house, so instead I did their clothes this weekend. They had a half day on Friday, so we did Sam's clothes after lunch. I chose to do his first because he's older, and I knew he'd have some hand-me-downs for Ben.

Sam has two large drawers that slide under the boys' bunk bed. As you can see, the struggle with large drawers is that things get jumbled up together. Nothing stays in the right place when Sam is moving stuff around trying to find what he wants.

We put the pile on my bed.

Sam and the "keep pile"

Sam is nine, so he had a clear understanding of what we were doing. He enjoyed having a project to do with me. It was nice to spend time together. I taught him how to fold things correctly, and he caught on and was able to do it. When he surveyed his giant pile of clothes, he said, "Wow, I'm really spoiled, Mom. I have a lot of clothes." We talked about giving his unwanted clothes to Goodwill or his brother, and that made it easier for him to say goodbye to some of his clothes. Sam is a big-time hoarder (I dread doing the sentimental items part of his room), so getting him to part with anything is a big deal.

Shirts and pants

Pajamas, socks & underwear, and the ties the boys share

I bought those bins at the dollar store to help Sam keep his socks and underwear from sliding around in the drawer. We had an extra one, which stored the boys' ties perfectly. When Sam and I were done, I showed Benjy the clothes Sam didn't want, and allowed him to choose what he wanted to keep. He loved "shopping" through Sam's old clothes.

When Sam got dressed this morning, I asked him what he did with his pajamas. His response? "I folded them the special way and put them back with my other pajamas."

via GIPHY

Saturday was Benjy's turn. Right before we got started, he got mad that his dad wasn't letting him play basketball, and when I told him it was time to tidy, he refused. I was patient (for the first time ever), and waited it out. In a few minutes, he got up on his own and helped make a giant pile. All three of my kids loved that part of tidying the most!

Benjy has an upright dresser with conventional-sized drawers, but he still mixes up his clothes while looking for what he wants.

"Look at all the clothes I have, Mom!"

Benjy told me at first that he wanted to keep all of his clothes. I was still able to get him to discard some things. He was excited to give some clothes to one of his friends who is younger than him. He didn't want to fold, but after I showed him how he gave it a try and decided it was fun. Benjy is like that. He has to decide for himself that he's into something. I let him choose which clothing went in which drawers, and he appreciated getting to choose.

Pajamas

Socks, underwear, swimsuits (yes I went back to the dollar store for more bins)

Pants and shorts

I have high hopes for the new drawers. Both boys were warned that if they messed up the drawers, we'd have to do this all over again. I also offered to help them if they weren't sure where to put things or if something got unfolded. I have loved my new drawers, and I hope the boys will, too. That will make it easier for them to keep their clothes in order.

Next week: My books. I'm a little terrified.

Tidying Up Tuesday: Amelia's Clothes

I have been LOVING the new layout of my drawers. I even showed them to my parents on FaceTime because I was so excited about it. And good news! My husband wants to go through his clothes, too! It's just a matter of finding the time. Maybe when he's finished renovating our bathroom.

This week's project: my four-year-old's clothes.

Her stuff tends to get jumbled up in her drawers as she tears them apart looking for the specific thing she wants. I'm hoping that with our new way of folding, she won't do that as much because she'll be able to see all of her clothes. But, she is only four, so I'm prepared to have to redo these drawers a few times.

Making the big clothes pile was a lot of fun!

We piled her things on my bed. 

Amelia had a lot of fun going through her clothes with me. She said YES to just about everything, even shirts I know she's never worn because they "aren't pink enough." Some of those yeses I honored, and some went into the donate pile when she wasn't looking. We also found several items that were clearly too small for her and for some reason had never been culled out of her clothes.

Her donate pile was much smaller than mine!

In the end, we took clothes to the consignment store, Goodwill, and the Laramie Foster Closet, which provides children's clothes to foster families that have an immediate need for clothing.

Refolding everything took a while. In the end, though, I got everything to fit. One of her drawers had extra blankets in it, so I emptied that out and used it for some summer clothes that I'd saved because they'll probably fit her next summer. That got the summer clothes out of two drawers in one of the plastic containers in her closet. My goal of eradicating the plastic drawers in my house is becoming closer to a reality.

Anyone want to take bets on how long these drawers look like this?

Next week: Sam's clothes

Tidying Up Tuesday: My Clothes

Today was the first day of tidying, so I started with my clothes. I figured it'd be easier than starting with my kids' stuff, because no one else needs to give input on my clothes. I'd be flying solo.

I have clothes in three places: a dresser in my bedroom, a plastic three-drawer cart in my closet, and my daughter's closet. Amelia's closet is the biggest in the house by far, and yet she's the smallest and the only one who doesn't share a room with anyone else. So my husband's clothes hang in our closet, and mine go in Amelia's room.

I did a few things to prepare for tackling my clothes. Yesterday I made sure I washed everything of mine that was in the hamper, so I wouldn't miss anything today. I also made sure the clothes I wore yesterday were things I knew I'd be keeping, so I wouldn't have to retrieve them from the hamper to sort them. Same with the clothes I wore to exercise this morning. I was not into the idea of putting dirty clothes on my bed.

Here's my pile:

Remy is not amused

It might not look too big in the photo, but I think that's because my dresses and skirts were on top and they covered a lot of the smaller items. And yes, those are two wedding dresses piled up on the side. It's a long story.*

*no it isn't; I was engaged before Ryan and I started dating, and I broke things off before the wedding but after buying a dress. And I wasn't going to wear a tainted dress to marry Ryan.

I went through the pile and tried to spark joy with my clothing. Some of it clearly did, like a shirt with owls on it that my sister gave me ten years ago, and a t-shirt that says Reading is For Awesome People. Other items were meh, but I had to keep them for practical reasons (like the undershirts I use to layer). Some thing actively sparked hate, like the nylons I haven't worn in years because they suck. Those went in the trash. I also found a ton of maternity/nursing stuff in the plastic drawers that I finally felt like I could get rid of.

After I went through everything, I had to put it all back. Good news! I no longer need to put anything in the plastic drawers! My hanging things are still in Amelia's closet. Maybe I can convince Ryan to sort through his clothes, and then rearrange our closet so both of our stuff can fit in it. A girl can dream. The hardest work was fitting things in my dresser. I decided to reconceptualize where things in the drawers went, to fit everything in. I'm really pleased with how it turned out. Completing this project (except for taking the clothes to donate) took about two hours.

Pants drawer: jeans and other ankle-length pants; leggings and exercise pants; shorts. THEY ALL FIT WHEN YOU FOLD THEM KONMARI-STYLE

Pajama drawer: Pajama tops; pajama bottoms; sports bras and swimsuit

Because I don't buy a lot of clothes, and because I'd gone through my clothes two years ago, I anticipated that I wouldn't get rid of very many things. I was wrong.

That's a laundry basket overflowing with clothing I no longer wanted.

Our local consignment shop only lets you give 25 items a week, so I picked out the 25 best ones and took them in to the store. They also took the hangers I no longer needed. The rest of the clothes I gave to Goodwill. I did throw some things away, like the nylons and some undershirts that were pretty ratty. All in all I got rid of around 60 items of clothing. Plus, I am finally going to deal with the extra wedding dress I've been carting around for 11 years. On that note, do you need a wedding dress?

Next week: Amelia's clothes

Tidying Up Tuesday

Have you seen Netflix's new show Tidying Up With Marie Kondo? It is my new favorite thing. I especially love that Netflix chose to air it at the beginning of January. For me, January is a month of hope, where I resolve to take control of my life and change the things that make me unhappy. Do I stick with those changes all year? Not always, but for January, at least, things are magical. It also doesn't hurt that my birthday is at the end of the month!

I read Marie Kondo's bestseller The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up almost two years ago. I found a lot of good in the book, including several principles that I have managed to follow consistently since then. This includes the idea that it's easier to clean up if things have a clear place that they belong, a principle that made cleaning my kids' rooms easier. I have also embraced storage totes in my life. And finally, when deciding whether or not to part with an item, I find it easy to tell myself that if I haven't used it in years, I don't need to hang on to it. If I suddenly need it five years from now, chances are I'll be able to replace it.

I did the first step, Clothing, two years ago, and really enjoyed the results. I do fold my clothes differently now. Having the clothing stand up makes it so easy to see what is what, instead of having to dig through clothing stacked on top of each other. However, I only did my clothes. I didn't touch my kids' stuff. Why? I don't know. I lost steam, I guess.

The next step is Books, and I remember thinking two years ago that I would never get rid of my books, and that KonMari lady clearly did not respect books enough. Watching the Netflix show has really brought me around, though. When you deliberately choose what items to keep in your home, you feel better about what surrounds you. Unfortunately, two years ago, I allowed the thought of keeping all my books no matter what to be the thing that stopped me from tidying up the rest of my home.

We bought this house three and a half years ago. It's a fixer-upper; livable, but we've altered literally every room in the house. My husband tore down walls, built new walls, ripped out appliances, and even raised a sunken living room. In sum, our home is in a constant state of flux. Instead of dealing with the clutter and lack of organization, I've told myself for so long that this is the way things are, and I just have to deal with it. But that's not true at all. I can do something about the clutter and disorganization of my home.

It's January, and I'm feeling ready to change. I'm taking that energy and am going to use it to KonMari my entire home. I plan on chronicling it here, even though this is ostensibly a writing blog. Every Tuesday I plan on tackling the clutter, KonMari style. Tomorrow is my own clothing. Wish me luck!

New Year's Writing Resolutions

New Year's Eve is one of my favorite holidays--there's something satisfying to me about closing the door on a year and looking forward to a new one. I love making New Year's resolutions. I am not great about keeping them after January, but I am great about not beating myself up about that fact.

This holiday season, however, has been exhausting. I've had strep throat and a sinus infection (not at the same time, thankfully), which didn't help. There were things going on at my kids' school and at church that I had to get through. One of my cousins got married in between Thanksgiving and Christmas, so I had some extra travel thrown in there. I saw a thread on Twitter about it being okay not to make resolutions for 2019 if you feel like just surviving is all you can do, and that really resonated with me. While I love the promise of a new year, and usually try to capitalize on that, I don't want making resolutions to feel like one more thing on an endless to-do list.

So we'll see how exhausted I feel on December 31st. Maybe I'll resolve to make improvements in my life. Maybe I'll resolve to be okay with just keeping my head above water. Whatever you may choose to do, I hope it brings you happiness and a sense of purpose.

Getting back into things

I quit NaNo because I got strep throat a few days before Thanksgiving. With family in town for the holiday on top of everything else, I just missed too many days to be able to make up the deficit. I was upset at first, because I didn't win last year, and really wanted a win this year to... I don't know, prove to myself that I was able to write a new book?

In the end, I decided I was okay with it, because I hadn't really wanted to start a new book in November. I wanted to work on the edits for the Ghost Girls book. So when I stopped writing for NaNo, I told myself I would work even harder on Ghost Girls.

And then I didn't. I gave myself permission to not write. I read a lot. I worked on Christmas stuff. But today I finally felt the itch to get back to it. And it was glorious. I hope the itch lasts. Because I really love this book.

Fun Announcement!

I'm teaching a class at the Storymakers writing conference next May!

I went to my first Storymakers as a baby writer, and fell in love with the camaraderie of being surrounded by fellow writers, the amazing agents and instructors that appear, and if I'm being 100% honest, getting a weekend away from being MOM. I took a couple of years off when my youngest was born, and now I attend every year. I always come home with new skills I'm eager to try, and at least one new friend.

After the last Storymakers, I stopped by one of my grad school classmates' homes on my way out. We were talking about what I'd been doing all weekend, and I mentioned some of the classes I took, including one on poisons taught by Gregg Luke, a pharmacist and author. My friend and her husband said, "You could teach a class like that, for genetics!" And thus the idea was born. I pitched the class to the conference organizers, and a few weeks ago was informed that they'd like me to teach the class!

I would highly recommend the Storymakers conference even if I weren't presenting. The faculty and special guests are top-notch. The atmosphere is inclusive and supportive. If you're considering attending a writing conference in 2019, you should definitely check it out: http://ldstorymakersconference.com. While many of the organizers and attendees are members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the conference does not have a religious angle and all are welcome to attend. I'd love to see you there!

Why I Do NaNoWriMo

(a version of this post originally appeared on Operation Awesome)

National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) starts Thursday. I love this time of year; I honestly get more writing done than I do the rest of the year. I write more consistently, and I take more chances. I like who I am as a writer in November.

Because NaNo is such a big part of my life, I tend to reflect on it every October. I wrote this back in 2015 to share why NaNo means so much to me, and how it transformed me as a writer. Here it is again, updated for 2018:

 

When I was in college, I worked at an independent bookstore in Fort Collins (that sadly went out of business several years ago). One chilly day, I was working in the cafe, making drinks for several people sharing a table with their laptops out. I asked them what they were doing, and they told me about National Novel Writing Month. I was in my last semester of my undergrad program, and pretty swamped with applying to graduate school, but I filed NaNoWriMo away under "Things I'd like to do someday." I liked writing, but had never gotten serious about it. I thought maybe this NaNoWriMo thing could help me out.

And then I got married, and started grad school, and had a kid, all in a twelve month period. I was busier than I ever have been in my life. And I forgot about NaNoWriMo.

Then I finished grad school, and became a full-time stay-at-home mom. My husband decided to go for a second bachelor's degree and pursue an opportunity to work for our church's education system while working the 7pm-7am shift as an emergency department admitter three nights a week. I think that was probably the busiest he's ever been in his life.

I got pregnant again during that time, which for me meant dealing with horrible nausea and near-constant vomiting. My husband was gone all the time, my one-year-old was running me ragged, I couldn't keep food down... my life was a mess. And then at the beginning of October, we lost the baby. So while my poor husband tried to keep us afloat, I was mostly alone every night; no longer sick to death, but very, very sad.

On the 31st of October, a friend announced on Facebook that he was starting NaNoWriMo the next day. I remembered the people from the bookstore cafe, and how much I had wanted to join in at the time. My husband was at work, so I signed up for NaNo and spent the rest of the night jotting down some ideas for a novel. And on November 1st, I went for it.

Spending each night writing while my son slept and my husband worked was amazingly cathartic for me. Having something to look forward to every night helped ease me through my grief. There was also a great community of NaNo writers for me to talk to--I'd never had any friends interested in writing before. When I emerged victorious on November 30th, my husband threw a party for me with several of our friends where I got to read some of my book to them. I felt special again, not just an object of people's pity.

That sense of purpose and feeling of community is a huge part of why I keep coming back to NaNoWriMo every November. It's why I love the Twitter community of writers and other publishing professionals, and why I enjoyed contributing to Operation Awesome for the three years I was with them. I believe in NaNo's power to inspire writers, so when my region needed a Municipal Liaison last year, I volunteered. I love giving back to the program, and cheering my band of writers along.

Do you participate in NaNoWriMo? What do you love about it?

Plot twist!

As you may have heard, my agent, Jill Corcoran, is leaving agenting to pursue a career with the Smithsonian. This is great news for Jill, who describes her new position as a dream job. I am genuinely excited and happy for her.

Of course, it does leave me looking for a new literary agent. I thought I would be absolutely devastated at the prospect, but the truth is I'm feeling optimistic. This is just a plot twist in the story of how I become a published author, not the ending.

Cross your fingers for me, friends.

Back-to-School means Back-to-Writing

My two older kids are back in school.

I love my kids, but those two constantly pick at each other, so when they're home all day all I do is break up fights. Now, it's just me and the three-year-old at home during the day, so things are much more peaceful. My daughter likes to take naps next to me in the afternoon while I work on my computer, which means I get at least an hour of writing time every day!

It's THE BEST. THE. BEST.
Now if you'll excuse me, I have a scene to revise.